The Enforcer

As much as Charlie likes to ignore the rules of our household, when he's out in public, he adheres to a surprisingly strict moral code. Like most people, he has a couple of things that really get his goat; 1) littering and 2) not wearing a bike helmet.

At the park he'll walk up and hand me a sticky wrapper, "Here, Mommy, someone littered. They are so bad. They are not respectful at all!" Brian's big on respect and respecting one's elders. He tries to drive that message home every time Charlie calls him a yucky poo poo head or laughs when he's trying to dole out a punishment. Seems it's working but in ways he never expected. Respect for the park, yes; respect for Daddy, no. I think we could be bearing witness to the rise of the next leader of the Earth Liberation Front.

He notices trash everywhere, which is a sad statement; the highway, the parking lot of the grocery store, on walks through our neighborhood. The problem is he wants to clean it all up. I don't want to discourage this kind of behavior, but I'm usually the go between for Charlie and the garbage can. I'm quite accommodating, though I draw the line at chewed gum and old socks.

I understand where he gets the cleanliness from. His dad is part OCD, I pick up trash on hikes, and tend to complain about litter. But the bike helmet thing is a mystery. He's like a Jewish mother traffic cop. When we drive in the car and he sees someone sans helmet, he literally roles down his window and screams at them. Usually something like, "Hey, lady, where's your helmet? Go home and get your helmet." or "Hey, man, you're going to fall and crack your head open and bleed." Of course this generally startles the person so much so that they almost do fall and crack their head open. Those window locks do come in handy.

It makes me laugh because I hear myself and Brian in each utterance. You become keenly aware of how your every action and word can effect your kid. Kind of scary really. I don't dwell too much on it. I just rest easy knowing that our parks are cleaner and the streets are a little safer when the Enforcer is around.